Perhaps I’m not so cool….but neither is Vogue 8894

Yup, thats a shock.  My tastes usually run more toward the festooned than the grungy.  The Grunge Sewalong about had me beaten.

I had absolutely no inspiration. I began to wonder, where was I during the 90’s? Oh. I was working retail. In the South. So I have of course blocked out my conforming null style from that period!

So lets see about what I love about the 90’s grunge era:

Long dresses and sleeves, mixed prints, hard boots….hmm……Ok lets do this. Regardless of my husband saying that he could not even picture me and grunge in the same sentence. This led to a ‘well what is my style?’ discussion that is best left down the rabbit hole where it was conducted!

More Perry Ellis for you! Yes, I know Agyness is too young to have seen grunge first hand, but a style without an update is just a costume 

Hmm….

No. Back to Agyness….Deanna and I figured it out. There was just nothing counterculture or ironic about wearing flannel and boots in the south in the 90’s. It was just another day at Walmart.

Phew! That was close! Ok, I think I have my plan. Vogue 8894. Sort of Boho, but doable.

Get your Screaming Trees cd out, we are going for it!

This pattern needed major alterations, vague darts, odd armpit dog ears, a v so low it was in the cleavage basement……it was like a bad starter pattern that you just kept adjusting and futzing with.

I like this with a little cardy and of course nothing makes an outfit like a Disney Couture Bambi scarf, right? I’m badass. You can say it. That’s why the cameo on the bodice is off kilter. Irony, I has it.

I love the hem, but I don’t think this is a very flattering or well designed pattern. It’s kimono-no-no. I brought the side seams up into the armpit area a good 3 inches and it still just bags under there. Good smugglin’ frock.

Do you remember me long ago
Used to wear my heart on my sleeve
I guess it still shows

Wore my jacket and I wore your sweater

Underneath the bridge it was an indian summer

Purple mascara, safety pins kickin’ the dirt

Took off your jacket took off my sweater

and we made a wish things would never be better

Train whistle blew my wish won’t come. oh no.

Take it to a higher place
Where this world ain’t in your face
You and me, carson mccullers
Take it to a higher plane
Take me where the action ain’t
Open windows
Open shutters

Now, indulge me and enjoy the ultimate 90’s whiplash- Joan Jett and Paul Westerberg covering Cole Porters’ Let’s Do it’ for the Tank Girl soundtrack:

photo credits: google images, pattern review, meadhawg. All images remain the property of their original owners. A special thanks to Courtney Love, Cole Porter and Paul Westerberg for inspiration.